Hey Brewer

Just concluded, the first leg of the semifinal match between FC Barçelona of Spain and Schalke 04 of Germany, played in Shalke’s stadium, the Veltins-Arena (which is located very close to the Veltins Brewery). Barça had ridiculous amounts of possession in the 1st half, scored early, and took the one goal lead into the break. Now, if you have been following this team as of late, you know the second half of an away match where Barça has a 1 - 0 lead has only two outcomes:

- Barça survive a barrage of attacks and headers and win 1 - 0.
- (much more likely) Barça hang on for awhile but eventually give up an equalizer, and possibly the go-ahead goal.

Why they always seem to get unglued, unfocussed, tired, and can’t jump in the second half is beyond explanation. Unless they spend halftime smoking L’s with Frank Rijkaard and Ronaldinho making sweet samba-dub music.

More importantly, one of the commentators on ESPNDeportes during the match made reference to a “cervezaducto”, which I now submit as the greatest fucking thing I have ever heard of. From wikipedia’s entry on the Veltins-Arena:

In order to provide for over 60,000 spectators, the Veltins Arena is equipped with an abundance of catering facilities. With 15 small restaurants, 50 grilling stations and 35 cafés, the stadium can serve up to 2,500 kg of sausages, 7,000 pretzels, and 1,000 m² of pizza in one day. These catering areas are connected to a 5 km long beer-line, supplying them with roughly 52,000 litres of beer per matchday

52,000 litres of beer!!! I don’t know what that equates to in real measurements, but 52,000 of anything is a shet-load. That’s 1000 packs of cards. And each individual card is a beer, and two of those is a 2-liter of beer. Those fans must be one of the drunkest crowds in the world.

I wonder if any of those drunk fans ever tried to hook up a secret tap on that cervezaducto… I know I would.